When you first fell in love with your significant other you would have never thought of putting anything – or anyone – before them. And you were rewarded with unbelievable feelings of love, romance, and intimacy. Remember?
Then time passes on and you become more familiar with each other and those late night talks you loved to have – slowly but surely fade away. Life continues and your work and kids (if you have them) consume your time and energy and you put your marriage on the back burner. You didn’t intend to ignore your marriage, it sort of kind a just happened – ever so slowly and gradually – but nonetheless, it happened. And the more you ignored your relationship – the less love, romance and intimacy you felt from it. You can’t possibly think this is a coincidence.
Just as gas naturally expands to fill up the space available (like the size of a woman’s closet), the longer we are in a relationship, the easier it is to get lazy about nurturing and feeding it with love and attention. Ignoring anything, especially our marriage, erodes it, and eventually the love withers and dies and the marriage is over.
Avoid the fate of Heidi and Seal, and some of your friends relationships too, and remember to always pay attention to your marriage and avoid taking it for granted. Please don’t confuse being comfortable with each other as permission to be complacent with each other. This is a common and deadly mistake. Complacency lends itself to a lack of communication – which lends itself to lack of commitment- and it all goes downhill from there!
Success in anything we undertake in life requires commitment, effort and investment of time and energy. The same is especially true of our marriage. Take a moment and think about how much commitment, effort and energy you have put into your relationship lately. Be honest with yourself. Have you put the kids, your job, housework, your hobby, etc. before your relationship? Have you, albeit unintentionally, neglected your marriage, assuming it will always be there for you? If so, make a promise to yourself, starting today, and begin treating your marriage as the most important relationship in your life, because if you don’t, it is only a matter of time before you no longer have a marriage to ignore!!
Rekindle Romance and Happiness in Your Relationship,
Dr. Patty Ann
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