With the arrival of spring it feels so good to shed our winter clothes and head outdoors. Many people engage in spring-cleaning bringing to life the expression: “out with the old, in with the new.” Gardening aficionados get their mulch, seeds and all the other paraphernalia they need ready to bring forth a beautiful new garden. And what about your relationship? What do you do to enhance the love and intimacy in your relationship?
Now is a good time to do some spring cleaning in your relationship by taking a good look to see what you can weed out of it to create more room for love and growth. Are you holding onto past slights, hurts and whatever else you want to call less than ideal circumstances between you and your partner? If so, you are allowing resentment to build in your relationship. If this resentment is allowed to grow and it’s never weeded out, your relationship will eventually suffocate from negativity and hostility built up over time, leaving no room for any positive feelings.
The absolute biggest killer of love and intimacy in any relationship is resentment. Holding onto resentment is like allowing the weeds to take over your garden. The best way to let go of resentment is by forgiving your partner of any past hurts you have experienced. We are all human, therefore we all make mistakes and do things to the people we love that we regret. Therefore, let it go. Chances are you have done hurtful things to your partner as well and you would like their forgiveness too. Very few things are not worthy of forgiveness and we all know what these are.
The best way to let go of resentment is by having an open honest dialogue between you and your partner. Share with him/her what you are upset about, listen with an open heart and mind to their response to what you have told them and then come to terms with the situation, or if necessary, respectfully agree to disagree. Offer forgiveness if that is called for and then move on.
During the next few weeks, as you do your spring cleaning and gardening and begin to look forward to the summer months ahead, take a renewed interest in your relationship and let go of past hurts and resentments! Then you can watch the love bloom!
Rekindle Romance and Happiness in Your Relationship,
Dr. Patty Ann
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