We all enter into our relationships with high expectations. Why shouldn’t we? This is a very positive aspect of human nature. It makes no sense to have low expectations for our relationship; in fact, that would be counterproductive. Unrealistically high expectations, on the other hand, set our relationship up for failure. They set our partner up for not being able to deliver on a promise they either have not made or are incapable of delivering on.
Having unrealistic expectations for your relationship practically guarantees disappointment, anger, bitterness and ultimately failure.
After a relationship has lost its novelty, and the honeymoon phase is long gone, deep feelings of resentment, disappointment and anger towards our partner often emerge if you or your partner has set up unrealistic expectations for each other and your relationship.
Unrealistic expectations leave a trail of broken promises and an array of negative feelings between partners.
In order to avoid this disastrous situation, you must remember one thing. When you are setting up expectations for your relationship, it is imperative that you have a realistic understanding of what you are most likely to receive based upon a true assessment of who your partner really is – not who you want them to be! This will allow you to create realistic goals for your relationship based on solid and healthy expectations. It is great to set high expectations, as long as these expectations are grounded in a realistic framework. We do not aspire to become a biologist if we are not good in science. We do not aspire to have a singing career if we cannot hold a musical note. And we cannot expect from our partner a lifestyle or behavior of which they are just not capable of providing.
Remember, when setting expectations for your relationship, you must be realistic. Your partner’s innate qualities and capabilities will not change because you set unrealistic expectations for them. Realistic expectations will help to create a lifetime of love and happiness in your relationship and avoid unnecessary disappointment and resentment.
Rekindle Romance and Happiness in Your Relationship,
Dr. Patty Ann
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