How to Use the 3 Most Powerful Words to Keep Your Romance Alive

In the archives of movies from the 1960’s, “Love Story” was a popular movie starring Ryan O’Neil (yes, that’s Tatum’s daddy) and Ali McGraw. This movie was about two young Harvard students who grew up in two very different socio-economic worlds, fall in love and get married.  Yes, versions of this plot have been written and re-written hundreds of times since the original version of forbidden love was written by Shakespeare in the classic story of Romeo and Juliet. Unlike Shakespeare’s romantic tragedy; however, the young lover’s in “Love Story” do not commit suicide. Both the movie and book “Love Story” began with the sentence: “What can you say about a 24 year old who dies of cancer?” The tragedy of this movie lies in the bride’s (Ali McGraw) diagnosis and death from cancer. You can see this movie was a real tear jerker and it represented many social themes which are as relevant today as they were during the time of Romeo and Juliet.

So by now you are probably wondering what in the world does this have to do with my promise of giving you 3 powerful words needed to keep romance alive in your relationship?  The movie “Love Story” had a very popular expression which resonated with many people – so popular that posters and bumper sticks were made up with the words: “love means never having to say you are sorry”. To think that people really believe this sentiment greatly concerns me.

Nothing, absolutely nothing could be further from the truth! As a matter of fact, the 3 most powerful words you must be able to say to keep romance and intimacy alive in your relationship are the 3 words: “I am sorry”.

The ability to say these 3 words: “I am sorry” are the most powerful words needed to sustain your love and intimacy through the good times and the bad. In fact, the ability to say “I am sorry” will be more effective in keeping your relationship strong and romance alive throughout the years than saying the words: “I love you”.


The words “I love you” are undeniably very powerful and meaningful words a couple say to each other when they are expressing their feelings of commitment, love and romance. However, the words “I love you” will not help you sustain your romance and steer you through the rough seas every couple encounters when their little love boat sails into the stormy seas of life. It is the ability to speak, with sincerity, the words: “I am sorry” that will get you through those turbulent storms intact and allow you to stay connected for the long haul.

Your life’s journey as a couple must begin with the words: “I love you”; but these words won’t mean diddly squat if you can’t express feelings of sorrow, remorse and true forgiveness when life gets in the way of your love. The ability to forgive, which I define as letting go of unintended and non-malicious pain and hurt your partner has caused you begins with a couple’s ability to say: “I am sorry” to each other. And believe me, once the honeymoon is over, it will only be a matter of time before you hurt each other, albeit unintentionally. Therefore, the ability to go the distance and keep romance alive in your relationship begins with these 3 powerful words: “I am sorry” – use them with sincerity.

Rekindle Romance and Happiness in Your Relationship,

Dr. Patty Ann
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