Spring ushers in new life all around us. Gardeners plant seeds to grow new flowers and many people do a little spring-cleaning around the house so they can make room for bright new things. Spring is as good a time as any to clean out some heavy baggage that may be dragging down your relationship as well.
Just as holding onto old clothes and objects takes up precious space in your closets and cabinets – preventing the addition of beautiful new things into your life, hanging onto negativity takes up precious, valuable emotional space in your relationship that prevents the blooming of warm and positive feelings and interactions.
Following are 4 easy tips for cleaning out the toxicity in your relationship this spring – so you can experience renewed and re-invigorated experiences with the one you love!
- Take a look in the Mirror. Our relationship with others begins with our relationship to ourselves – and our own individual mindset. If you don’t feel good about whom you are as a person – and if you have a negative mindset, you are carrying around a lot of negativity and destructive feelings. You must let go of this negativity and replace it with positive feelings and thoughts. Viewing your life through a positive mindset will help you create positive relationships with others; this is as true for your intimate relationships as it is for your non-intimate ones as well.
- Spice up your relationship, including your sex life, by adding a bit of variety into what you do as a couple both in and outside of the bedroom. Avoid falling into a rut with your life and sexual activities by doing the “same old same old” – especially in the bedroom (you know exactly what I’m talking about). This predictability creates boredom and a lack of excitement (yawn) in your relationship. Throw out the old habits and activities and begin creating space for new adventures by discovering exciting activities you can enjoy as a couple.
- Review your priorities. Take an inventory of what you choose to spend your time on, as both an individual and a couple. Make sure you are spending enough quality time together having fun and enjoying the things you love. Prioritize your relationship by making sure it doesn’t get delegated to the back burner – thinking you will get back to it once the kids are older, your career is more stable etc. Failing to prioritize your relationship might leave you without a relationship/marriage – so please don’t do this!
- Let it Go – as the popular hit song from the Disney Movie Frozen says! If you and your partner are having the same old argument over and over again, involving a silly and/or trivial manner, respectfully agree to disagree and then let it go. Holding onto these arguments that you know will only drive a wedge between you and your spouse, creating ill will along the way – does not serve your relationship in any positive way. So just let it go!
Take inventory of all the emotions you are holding onto in your relationship and throw out anything that is toxic and/or doesn’t positively enhance your relationship. Throw out the old hurts, grudges and negativity that weigh down your relationship. Prioritizing your partner and your relationship is a great way to enter the spring season – and watch the love reawaken and grow!
Rekindle Romance and Happiness in Your Relationship,
Dr. Patty Ann
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