We fall in love because we make ourselves emotionally vulnerable to our partner by opening our hearts and souls to them. It is this vulnerability that allows for the intimacy in our relationship to grow into trust. In marriage, nothing violates this trust more than infidelity
Following are some simple do’s and don’ts for keeping your marriage together while growing individually within the relationship.
3 Do’s to Avoid Infidelity
- Maintain your friendships. Do not allow your world to shrink down to your relationship between yourself and your spouse. No one person can be all things to another person – and it is a huge mistake to even try; therefore keep your friendships strong.
- Explore new activities and make new friendships together with your spouse. Meet your partner’s friends and have he/she meet yours. Engage in new activities and hobbies together; this will keep your marriage from getting into a rut and going stale. It also prevents boredom – a key reason many people often state for cheating.
- Maintain your individuality – do not give up all aspects of who you were before your marriage. Molding yourself into the person you think your partner wants you to be ignores the fact that your partner fell in love with who you were before you got married. Over time, losing your individuality will make you boring.
3 Don’ts to Avoid Infidelity
- Don’t flirt with anyone whom you think might have the slightest romantic interest in you. Flirting with these people starts out innocent enough but it can easily lead you down a slippery slope.
- Don’t confide to people of the opposite sex about your marriage problems – especially work colleagues. Confiding in someone with whom you spend a lot of time with during the day can intensify your “friendship” and then lead you down the slippery slope mentioned above.
- Don’t turn your relationship into a parental one- meaning you should not be asking each other for “permission” to do things. You should be having a conversation about activities you want to do and then discuss them – there is a huge difference between the two. Your partner is not your parent so don’t create a parent-child dynamic by asking for permission.
If you follow these 3 do’s and don’ts in your marriage, you should avoid the devastating pain of infidelity.
Rekindle Romance and Happiness in Your Relationship,
Dr. Patty Ann